BACK from the dead.

I like tricks. Jokes. People making fools of themselves deliberately or otherwise. My favourite tv show is Americas Funniest Videos, or AFV in our now acronym savvy society. Makes me laugh so hard, sometimes I even have to hold my tummy like the laughs just gonna jump right outta there. The funniest ones are people falling off or over stuff, makes me split I tell you. There's this new one where you can buy a fake scratchy that when you scratch it it says you've won a million bucks and people give it to their dad, nan, ma, sibling at christmas and record them going hysterical nuts to have won and then tell them it's fake. Pure gold.

Anyway, in July last year Gran died.
Today, I got this in the post.



Incase you can't read it it says:
'Dear Amber, I found this spare key in my pocket when I got up here. Love from Gran'. It's in her hand writing although back in the days when her handwriting was actually legible.

I got it, opened it, knew it was from mum, laughed at how clever she would be thinking she was and rang her.

Just incase you think mums a sadist Pete and I pranked her good last April fools when we were living at hers. While mum and I went out for a morning walk pete drove the car round the corner, left a note on the bench to say he'd left me and hid upstairs. I spent our half hour walk telling mum how tough the move to NZ had been and that Pete and I were really unhappy and not working out. When we got home I let her enter the kitchen to read the note first. Her voice shook when she told me 'I'd better come read this'. We pranked it all the way upstairs with me running ahead of her and screaming back that all pete's stuff had gone only to have him jump up from behind the bed 'TA-DA!' She just about slogged me in the face.

The day before, mum and I had got pete a treat too calling on his CPR skills for a fake accident, making him run out of the house terrified but driven. So I can't blame mum for thinking it's about my turn.

When I rang, the phone went through to voicemail and I had the second best idea I've ever had. DOUBLE-PRANK! and so on the spur of the moment I left a hysterical voicemail about 'some freaky stuff, making you question everything you ever thought about life and death and I really need to talk to you now!'. ah hahahahaha I am already laughing at my own pure genius.

Mum called back and guess what that woman's just tried on? Only a bloody TRIPLE-PRANK. She let my hysteria run on the phone, focussing my dilerium into a potential prophecy of an existing god! I decided it had gone to far and dropped into conversation that god must be giving gran hand writing lessons and she went quiet but I KNOW she was doing silent laugh and said perhaps she sits next to Jesus at school.

The big question is what do I do now? Dare I quadruple prank, fast track the insanity and rub faeces on my face while scribbling on the walls or possibly worse, admit on this occasion, I've lost...